The reason your here is something you wish you could define. But it ,
if you’re lucky, only usually turns out to be a feeling, an instinct
that you follow.
If I hadn’t followed that volcano of my psychotic and artistic nature,
I would probably have my own house,a beautiful wife and kids by now…
But I can guarantee you I would not be happy.
I’ve followed the call, because I feel in my gut that I am here to do
something with music, and not to give up on it, no matter how much the
glass cuts into my hands as I cling to the broken window , 30 floors up.
Maybe I’m stupid to sacrifice everything for it, love, money, and yes
you could say I’m married to my music. I can only really ever have a
But I wouldn’t want it any other way, it’s just I’ve asked myself this
question a million times over.
The answer is still the same, still comes from the darkest side of me,
from that supernatural force that is The Ghost That Walks. The blue
skinned one who never gives up on me and lives in my head, god knows
The point of your existence and the reason why you follow a certain
path has always been a wondrous thing to me. It’s like looking at the
world from a 100 miles up, as it rotates and changes in a split second,
each rotation changing peoples lives forever. But I feel that movement,
the wheels turning , cogs interlocking, puzzle pieces slotting into
place. Yet I still wonder why I’m here in China, it doesn’t feel I’ve
learnt much except the pitiful human nature of people.
When given the chance to piss on people, they take it, because the
rules are bent and broken here.
How many times have I heard “This is China”, which translates as “I
don’t give a f*ck”.
All the things people would not do in there own country, respect,
behavior, abuse, fidelity, honour, disappear like they never existed. I
despise those people and would leave them to bleed in the gutter ,
ignoring their cries if they needed my help. You made your choice, deal
with it, live with it, there is no way back for you…..
At least I can hold my head up that I didn’t change when I came here.
Exodus imminent, extraction rolling…
Very tired after a long day of the usual grind, I sometimes wonder why do I bother and is it all for nothing.
Probably. Sometimes when you have to listen to the same thing over and over, tailored for whoever's ears , laced with lies, exaggerated and plain old b*llsh*t.
It really makes you want to retch. Sometimes wonder if I’m even cut out to walk in the “normal” world at all.
Mainly because I’m probably not supposed to even be here, or exist on many levels, but somehow the planets
aligned and a freak of nature was born…
Anyway, knackered and off to get some rest, till next time…
The Ghost That Walks